The biggest misconception in the adoption world.

Discouragement is a black hole. A dark, black, endless hole that I was recently sucked into when it comes to bringing in the funds for our adoption. We've been receiving money from various fundraisers, but not in large sums. That, coupled with several rejections in a row after petitioning people/programs that help adoptive families out with online fundraisers, brought about some pain. We have also had some trouble with getting our silent auction set for July 26th going smoothly. These blows have caused some tension in mine and Robby's lives and has caused us to question what we're doing wrong, if anything. There are only two things that we have been absolutely positive of:


God instructed us to adopt Lene and He will supply the means necessary to do so.


I see other adoptive families putting events together to raise money where they work hard and subsequently reap the benefits of it monetarily. Naturally, I have assumed that I should act in like-kind. But the truth is that Robby and I both feel that God has something very specific up His sleeve when it comes to manifesting the money for this process. In other words, we do not feel like we should be launching fundraisers left and right, as is considered a pretty normal part of the process. We feel like we should take a step back and wait for God to speak and instruct.

That may seem like a "duh", but in reality I think many of us sometimes believe that when God tells us to do something and we agree to do it, we should then take off running at full speed and attempt to make it happen by our own agenda. In the adoption world, there's a very regular sense of panic while watching the clock and applying for this grant, while putting together that fundraiser, and writing letters for support- all at the same time or one right after the other. I, too, have briefly fallen into this trap of "frantic fundraising" because my beautiful little girl is in an orphanage half a world away and needs a family. And she's been waiting her entire life. And that's not fair. But if I'm trying to run amuck and make realities happen without being still and waiting on particular step-by-step instruction from the Lord, then I'm making this about me. About what I can accomplish to bring my child home. About what I can force to happen in the quickest time-frame possible. Where is there room in that for the glory that God so incredibly deserves? And in the process I am frustrated, rejected, hurt, anxious, and growing bitter in my heart because things aren't happening like I believe they should be. If I step back and look at the entire picture without honing in on every little detail, it is crystal clear that God doesn't tell anyone to do something and then drop the ball and expect them to create the reality according to their will, their timing, and in their own, preferred ways. God expects us to do it all HIS way. Why? 

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

    neither are your ways my ways,”

declares the Lord.

9 

“As the heavens are higher than the earth,

    so are my ways higher than your ways

    and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Isaiah 55:8-9

We can fight for our children without fighting God's plan.

Maybe Lene won't come home as fast as I'd like for her to. Maybe the money will trickle in little by little over time or maybe God will do something jaw-dropping to bring about every red cent required tomorrow; whatever the case, I am still certain of only two things:


God instructed us to adopt Lene and HE will supply the means necessary to do so.


Now I stand ready, but still, waiting on His next direction.